Questionable call of the day - someone called because his Dad used to be black and had a message for him.  His mother didn't want him to get the message so she changed all of their DNA so they weren't black anymore and sent him to a realm where there were no people.

It's Margaret - I just wanted to tell you that while I was at the dentist, between 11:00 and 5:00, someone went into my room, the door was tied shut.  They touched my cell phone.  I can tell because it was all slippery and slimy.  They have listened to my messages.  Thank you.

A woman called and told me her upstairs neighbor follows her everywhere she goes.  When she goes to the bathroom he flushes his toilet.

To the guy who is going to call his congressman because we had a helicopter up looking for a stolen vehicle on a Sunday afternoon, interrupting peoples BBQ's - We found the car and along with it a houseful of stolen goods. It's what we do.

I just got a report of a car driving down the street totally covered in post it notes. I guess they don't stick well when driving at a high rate of speed :/

If you take pictures of your naked self and text them, and you happen to text them to the wrong numger, the Sheriff Dept cannot get them back for you.

An older lady name Margaret calls on a frequent basis.  She always identifies herself says what has happened, says thank you and hangs up.  There will be lots of Margaret stories in here - I love it when she calls.

"It's Margaret, I just called to report that my fabric shears were returned.  When I came home on the bus the driver asked me all kinds of questions like I didn't have the right to live free in this country and someone used my bathroom while I was at Target.  Thank you."

Conversations that make my job harder. "This is Fire, we need your ETA to the veh accident." "We are there." "My unit says you are not there." We are there, our deputy on scene reported it." "I know but my unit says you are not there so I need an ETA." "30 seconds." "Uhhhhh - ok." Radio units asking them to flag down fire, "We are here with fire."

Some calls I get squeeze my heart and make it hurt, it is a reminder that I still have a heart.

My partner just took this call.  Older female in blu bb cap driving a whi Honda swinging jumper cables at juvies in pkg lot.

"There is a nuclear bomb set to go off in LA tomorrow.  It has been publicized on the radio using the words Rising, Darva and Harp.  The plot goes back to before Eisenhower's time.  It is said to be a plot to start WWIII but the real reason is to subjugate women.  Do you believe me?"  "No."  "Oh well, will you report it anyway?"

Today's lesson for the criminally impaired - wearing the pants you stole from prison when you were released yesterday in public, especially when you aren't really that far from the prison will cause numerous cars with lights and sirens to descend on you and you will likely get a nice pair of bracelets to go with your new pants.

I had a woman call today and said she wasn't going to let her daughter kill herself again . . . i had no response for that.

Is this person black, white or hispanic?" "Well, they look like they have alzheimers."

And that was followed by a call from an irate mother wanting us to meet her on the roadside and when I ask what she is drivng she yells "MY CAR!"

I have worked police, fire and EMS dispatch for more than one agency.  I will share "Stories From Dispatch" on this blog.  All entries will be from calls I have taken myself or calls one of my partners have taken on my shift.  These are true "stories"... I couldne make these up if I tried.